I took a little break from blogging because I've discovered that the anniversary of my mastectomy puts me into a bit of a funk. It's hard not to relive the increasing fear I felt as the day approached and then the day itself. It was one of those times when as bad as I was imagining, it was worse. Much worse. And it has definitely changed me forever. Ans as there is no cure yet for invasive breast cancer, you can't ever actually say you are cancer-free. Instead the term is No Evidence of Disease. I count my surgery day as the first day of being NED because, with clean margins and no discernible lymph node involvement, that was the day all known cancer was removed from me. The chemo and endocrine therapy that has followed is to delay any recurrence. I pulled myself together after letting myself sink into the memories a bit, and re-focused myself on gratitude for each day I've been given. So we sat out on the deck that evening for a little celebration of this bittersweet anniversary, of being 2 years NED.